31 days to coming home: easy breathing.

Wherever you are, be all there.
Jim Elliot

I think sometimes the biggest challenge is just to accept today.

Bc I’m always searching for more. More meaning. More understanding. More words. & maybe, maybe there isn’t always a lesson to be learned, a revelation to be unveiled. Maybe today is the leaves being influenced by the sun, holding deeper hues of apple red & firey orange. Maybe today is me, working the usual eight in the morn to five in the afternoon, blue jeans hugging my legs, H&M flowy shirt brushing my stomach, boot clomp giving my steps more boldness. Maybe today is me eating the chocolate off the bottom of my biscotti while I wait for the coffee to brew, my working my way through a stack of applications from the weekend, my picking up grace for the weekend at my lack of commitment to October’s writing challenge & choosing to make today a new day.

Maybe today wasn’t created for light bulb moments, but merely beauty beheld.

This is your Monday, October 6, 2014, meant to be felt. Open your heart wide & breathe deep.

I brace myself for the blow. Every day. Beautiful morning, light, easy feeling, & still, deep down, my fists are clenched, tense for the arrival of today’s difficulties. Because I know they’re coming. They always do.

So instead of breathing deep, embracing the first scents of fall, feeling the muscles in the arms wrapped around me, my minds busy going through everything that could go wrong, carrying me through things that haven’t yet, & could never, come.

I’m missing out.

Rest easy, love. Let peace be your portion. & for the sake of today’s slipping through your fingers like water, let tomorrow take care of itself. Feel today.

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground
outside your Father’s care. & even the very hairs on your head are numbered. So don’t be
afraid; you are worth far more than the sparrows.
Matthew 10:29

It’s your turn, love. Break the silence. Spill your guts.

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