To The Untamed Heart.

“‘Oh, no,’ said Dr. Dorian. ‘I don’t understand it. But for that matter I don’t understand how a spider learned to spin a web in the first place. When the words appeared, everyone said they were a miracle. But nobody pointed out that the web itself is a miracle.’”

-E.B. White, Charlotte’s Web

Everyday I look in the mirror, I see a miracle.

I was eighteen months old when my mom and dad took me to the eye doctor to find out I was blind in my left eye. A birth defect called morning glory syndrome. Though I’m not sure she knew the extent of my visual impairment, she noted my cautious, delayed walking, holding onto furniture to keep me stable a little longer than my two older brothers, both of whom were still under the age of four- their early milestones still freshly documented in her mind. My mother who never missed a beat- storing up every single memory of our childhood in her mind in the most impressive manner- leaving me wondering whose memory I received- catching onto that intuitive sense that something wasn’t right.

Following the examination, the verdict the eye doctor relayed to my parents was a high recommendation to visit the plastic surgeon. He didn’t hide his big feelings, insisting that the best move would be to put a plastic plate in my face to hold the left side of my face in place, as the nerve that sat fully developed but unconnected was responsible for upholding my face. After my parents firm no, he let them know that as I got older the left side of my face wouldn’t hold up without that nerve connection, and that it would be ugly and dramatic. He told them that I would be made fun of by other children because of the distortion.

I never had the surgery. I also never had a face that sagged dramatically and I’ve never had a classroom full of children pointing and laughing at my hideously distorted face. Every day I look in the mirror, the Lord presents to me his miraculous power and authority. He shows me what He is capable of.

I don’t even really think about it anymore. If I’m honest, though it’s all true, I don’t walk by the mirror every day and gasp at what the Lord has done- a very real walking miracle. Most days I’m immune to it.

In Numbers 9, the Lord tells Moses to remind His people of their very important date. On the ninth day of the second month. It’s time to celebrate the Passover.

While they all sit in the wilderness, filled with questioning the Lord’s goodness at taking them out of Egypt in the first place, he tells them to celebrate the power and miracle of the Passover.

They have been walking in the desert and the wilderness for a year now. The promised land is still nothing more than talk and I’m sure more than a few have their doubts that it isn’t anything more than wishful thinking. Sure, the Passover was a miraculous deliverance. Sure, the Lord had provided miracle after miracle, carrying them from glory to glory. From raining down manna for food, to water from a rock, to dividing the rivers in two, there were more miracles than we might even know what to do with. But in between these miracles were questions, doubts, complaints, golden calves,… enough evidence to prove their was very little thankfulness or recognition of the miracles for what they were.

And in the midst of it, sitting outside their tents in the middle of nowhere, the Lord tells them to celebrate their departure from Egypt. In the deepest part of the discomfort, in the lowest part of the story, while they were still waiting for that delivered promise, He told them to celebrate the binding that He loosened.

Sure, you might not be in the promised land, yet. You might not yet see the fulfillment of those dreams. You might be fighting your way through the hardest part of your story and maybe you’re even missing the comfort of the past… the ease of what He delivered you from. But there are miracles.

You might not be there yet, but that doesn’t mean that you aren’t experiencing the promised land of your childhood- walking in the promises and dreams the Father sealed within you in your youth, or in a different season. You are living in a land that is flowing with milk and honey, whether you have the eyes and heart posture to see it or not.

Look around you. Focus your eyes and search for the miracles, hopes, and promises of yesterday. Let them be the cup of coffee to carry you through the muck and into what you know He has for you. Those words he spoke to you in that secret place- his plans for you- they are still right here. You are safe in the stirring.