The world is distracting. The ways and lifestyles of those around us are visually appealing, they seem like fun, they seem fulfilling, everyone looks so happy. Often the appearance is simply that, an appearance. The fun happy image portrayed to the rest of us is a facade, one that falls apart quickly behind closed doors.
I’ve been there, in the midst of the world, in the midst of the mess, drifting from one temporary high to the next, telling myself that if I could just get to the next thing, I would finally be happy, satisfied, fulfilled.
The next thing didn’t provide any of those results however. The next thing just spurred me on to the next thing after it, and deeper into the grave I’d been unknowingly digging. I was in over my head, I was blind, I was lost, and my soul ached for something real, something redeeming, a rescue.
When God stepped in and spoke light into my heart, He illuminated every sick and depraved thing within me and around me. Those things that looked glamorous and beautiful in the dark, became rotten and decaying in the light. He broke my heart over and over as He showed me the destruction I had left in my wake, and even worse the damage I had done to myself. He absolutely wrecked me, broke me, humbled me, brought me to my knees with no other option but to cry out “Abba, Father, Lord, Creator, help me help me help me!” And you know what? He did just that.
The calm after the storm came, the comfort after the heartbreak, the soft glow of love and grace after the sharp pain of facing what my reality had become. He broke me, and then he put me back together and I was better than before, I was brand new and clean. I was forgiven, saved, set apart. He breathed life into dead and dry bones, He set me on fire for Him, He made me eternity-minded which has drastically changed the way I live my life while I still have it.
There are days even now when I see the life I used to live in others, and from the outside it still looks appealing. Some days I envy those people and their careless attitudes. I start to question why I’ve chosen to walk the narrow and difficult path, i start to wonder if it’s worth it. Moments like this are jarring to my soul because they expose me and my sin nature. They expose my sick heart. They show me that even though I’ve seen God’s glory and it’s been made so obvious to me that I’ve responded to His call in glad submission, I can still be distracted.
I can still be led astray by the enemy and his lies.
Even though these moments terrify me, I am incredibly thankful for them because they remind me to stay hungry and constantly seek to be fed. They remind me to fill my head and my heart with pure, beautiful, holy, blessed things. They remind me to open His living word and meditate on His teachings. They remind me to approach His throne boldly, and pray fervently. They remind me to thank Him every day, many times a day, for paying for my life with His blood. They remind me to sit in silence in the presence of my Father and just be.
Stay hungry, stay intentional about your pursuit of Him. Become saturated in Him, become so familiar with His nature that you see His hand in everything around you and His perfect will in your life in every peak and valley. Don’t lose sight of His face, don’t lose possession of His truth, don’t take the easy path because although it may seem right to man, it will lead you to death and an eternity apart from the one who loves you unconditionally, the one who loves you so much you were bought with innocent blood.
Hey Jesus, thank you for your love. Thank you for your grace and your gift of salvation offered to all those who want it. Thank you for your precious blood, shed to save the depraved human race since we were too sick, too blind, and too unable to save ourselves. I am praying now over anyone who has read these words you put heavy on my heart. Keep us hungry Lord, keep us yearning for more of you. Overwhelm us, overtake us, draw us out into the deepest waters where we have no choice but to trust you with all we are and all we have. Pour out your favor on us, pour out your blessings, keep us humble and thankful for everything you do and who you are. We love you we love you we love you. Amen!